Thursday, March 3, 2011


Today is a sad day.

Apollo is our wonderful standard poodle that came into our lives a few months after Mike and I were married. He's an amazing dog.

The sad part? His life is pretty non-existent at this point. Our lives have changed so much over the last few years, and Apollo's life has gotten really bad. He's alone almost all of the time, he can't go outside without us letting him out, and his days are spent in a 500sf space. The girls get mad at him all the time because his mouth is right at face level and he likes to lick, they don't like playing with him because he's big and knocks them down, and he's gotten to the point where he just goes and lays in the corner alone. 

It devastates me...but I know this is the kind thing to do. His new life will include lots of dogs, constant companionship, playing at the river, swimming, spending lots of time on a house boat...I think it's going to be doggy heaven and he's NEVER going to look back.

The best part? He's going to live with our friend. He won't be out of our lives...and he won't be far away.

But I can't help being so sad about's actually a bit hard to type through the tears right now. It almost feels like I've failed him in some way. I KNOW this is the most generous and self-less thing I can do for him, but with all the unbelievable stress and change in our lives, and all the responsibilities that have been heaped on my shoulders, I just feel like he's been lost in the whole thing. It's just not fair to him. Our life isn't going to get any easier any time soon and as a result, neither is his. In fact, I think it will get worse for him as the girls get older and busier.

In a weird way, I'm kinda looking forward to one less less thing to worry less thing to feel guilty about...  And that makes me feel even sadder and guiltier. I just think it will take time for me to heal.

I'll miss him...but the girls don't care. Zoe was singing, "Yeah, Apollo gets a new home tomorrow!" and Ava decided that without Apollo she can now go to Chuck E Cheese's. They're young...they see him as a nuisance. I don't. I see him as an amazing dog who happened into the wrong family at the wrong time.'s time to give him his life back. 

Love you, play, and bark like crazy!!!